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I’ve been struggling with what to write for a few days now.

I think it’s because this entire process is so surreal to me. Anyone who has picked up their entire life and moved to a new place, one they’ve never even visited, can probably understand.

This month has been a whirlwind and then yesterday we packed up our house, moved everything out, and our whole world changed.

But my poor brain is having a hard time computing everything.

I’m sitting on the Burd’s couch right now, hanging out with my friends, and I’m convinced (and Lola seems to be too…) that in a little bit I will get in my car and drive back to my pretty little house and go to sleep in our big king size bed.

But that is not going to happen.

Instead, we’re moving to Hawaii. Johnny leaves on Sunday to drive our car to California (we’re shipping it to Hawaii instead of having to find a car there) and I leave Tuesday to start my journey to meet him in LA before we fly to Kona.

This is our new reality.

Several times throughout the day I find myself trying to imagine what my life will look like a month from now, or two months from now. But I have no idea. And I’ve decided that’s just fine. Because my Jesus has asked me to surrender the life that I know and love for him, once again, and follow him on a new journey. And that means trusting that he has the very best for our family in mind, and I don’t need to know exactly what it’s going to be like. That’s the control freak in me. It’s okay for me to take it one day at a time, and allow God to surprise us with the beauty of a new journey.

I’m going to cry when I leave New York because I will miss so much that I can’t even begin to put it all into words.

And I think I might cry when we step off the plane in Hawaii because God asked us to do something, we listened, and has been so faithful to us every single step of the way.

If you know me at all, you know I’m a worrier and I struggle with taking risks because fear paralyzes me if I’m not careful. This move is one of the greatest risks Jesus has asked me to take in a very long time, and I am up for the challenge because of his strength, not my own.

I can’t wait to find out what our life in Hawaii will be like. I can’t wait to pour myself into a new ministry and serve in whatever way I am needed. I can’t wait to build relationships with the other staff and our students and I cannot wait to see what God is going to do in and through this school.

Thank you Jesus for letting me be a part of your eternal plan, I am humbled and overwhelmed by your trust in me and I will continue to share your love and fight to bring people back to your heart. I know I don’t deserve this incredible life you have blessed me with but I will continue cherish every second.

What a beautiful God we serve.